Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Beta Reminder - FET #1

In case you have forgotten, my beta is tomorrow! *deep breath*

I'm scared about the results. I don't think I was this scared last time.

I think my emotions are all messed up because this time I KNOW what a good beta means AND what a bad beta means. Both options are terrifying.

Don't doubt that I want my beta to be good, and I want it to stay good, and I want to bring home baby! I'm just fearful of all the what-if's between now and then. It is a long, long hard road.

I have been down the "beta looks good ...but isn't" path. That scares me just about as much, as it takes months to get over it and get back to feeling like yourself again. Miscarriages seem to chip away a little part of you every time...

Then there is the negative beta. Ugh. We all know about that one. :(

I can tell you this - I've had slightly sore boobs (mostly shooting pains), crampy pains, twinges of round ligament pain, incredible hunger, and exhastion. Hower, none of these have been with any fervor or lasted very long once they started. So, I'm not going to hold my breath that they are signs to hang my hat on.

So, we'll see. I'll let you all know as I can.


Stacie said...

I've got that vibe on you...I expect a positive! I'm thinking around 120ish. I am waiting anxiously to see if I am right!

All of what you wrote sound like great signs. Plus the tired reference on FB made me think it, too. :-)

(I am not often wrong, just so you know.)

ME Gregory said...

good luck - fingers crossed things go well and stay that way! I've had two m/c's this year in trying for #2, and I know what you mean about beta waiting. Just try to breathe and keep thinking those good thoughts. We'll be with you!