It Will Be Ok...

This post is a jumping off point from Watson's post about all the crazy things going on in her world right now...

I have been there... I have been knee-deep in a million huge, live-changing things and not been sure how I will ever survive it. Granted, her situation is a little different, but still...

When life gets like this for me I try, very hard, to make myself stop and chant "It will all work out, even if I don't know how right now - I just have to breathe".

Amazingly, this little sentence gets me through some of my biggest crisises because it was true for all of the previous big crisises!

Ever notice that... One minute you are just sure you'll never survive and the next you are fine, hanging out at friend's house having coffee and a cookie. Suddenly you realize 2 months have gone by and it is all OK - that big scary time becomes just a distant blip in your memory.

Sometimes it is crazy to think you actually lived... You realize you must be much stronger than you thought you were. You can even get a real boost remembering how scared you were, and yet you made it. I love that feeling. Roar!

Another post caught my attention tonight, from Infertile Fantasies, about friendship.

Recently I have been feeling a little blue about one of my "Class One" friends DD. It seems like she doesn't want to hang out with me anymore, and we are talking less and less often these days.

The thing is, I REALLY need her right now!!

DD is just like a sister to me, of course I'm assuming since I don't actually have one, but neither does she so it is close enough. I tell her things that I wouldn't tell another soul, and I KNOW she will understand it and accept me. She is the same with me - she knows without a doubt I will be here for her.

She has stopped working nearby, and lives quite a ways away, so now I don't see her unless there is some sort of event or entertainment taking place. We still talk on the phone some, but it isn't the same. We used to just hang out, with no events or distractions required. I want so much to be nearer to her physically again, because we share so much through laughter, silly stories and hugs.

I have felt that she is tiring of me, of my stories, of my company. I thought she did not want to be my sister anymore. I felt her slipping away slowly, and it hurt my heart terribly.

Then, while we were talking the other day we discussed what our lives would be if we never managed to have children. The discussion turned to how we would live out our later years, when DD asked seriously "Will you promise me something...". "Yes", I said. "When we are old, and our husbands have gone... Will you live with me? We can keep each other company."

I know it is silly, but I actually cried tears of joy for the first time in my life. I'm sure she couldn't hear me, but I was so overjoyed to know that DD still loves me. She still wants to be my sister. She's still a "Class One" friend.

I told her how happy she had made me, and of course I agreed to be there for her. It will be something to look forward to later in life.